Kevin Hart has a unique talent that gives him the natural ability to be humorous and make people laugh. When he talks, you can hardly tell if he’s joking or if he’s serious. Thanks to this talent, Kevin has acquired a worldwide reputation and has succeeded in becoming one of Hollywood’s most famous actors. Kevin is so good that many others have tried to imitate his style.
Kevin’s career is decorated with a truck full of funny jokes. After reviewing the comedian’s funniest moments, we compiled a list of Kevin Hart’s funniest quotes and lyrics. The quotes are simply too many and listing them all is a little too close to the realm of madness. So here are some of them. Sit down and read them while they send you hysterical people.
Kevin Hart’s Quotes And Sayings
- “In case you believe you were kicked in the face you then you most likely deserved it because that means that you had the chance to watch the foot come to your face.”
- “How do people manage to shit on themselves while they are asleep? That is some nasty shit….like what kind of sick dream were you having that caused that.”
- “Considering today’s relationships = First week: I love you baby. Second week: Together forever. And third week: Single.”
- “The only time you should look back on your life is to see how far you have come.”
- “I really hate to hear women argue this is because it makes my balls itch.”
- “I am an (expletive) liar. If in case I am late, something drastic happened. ‘Yo, dude, sorry I am late. I was on the highway, and this (expletive) baby began running on the highway. Yeah, I know right, (expletive) it’s crazy. Therefore I decided to get out of my car and start chasing the baby.’”
- “The scariest (expletive) to me in the world are the so-called bum hands. I am willing to bet you all any amount of money right now if you all walk out after this show, and a bum comes up to you, and flick your lip, that you kill yourself tonight.”
- “It is my mother’s funeral. I am on the right side, I have got the casket and I am crying; I am a mess. My father sees me crying; he stands up and punches me in the back of the head. ‘Man up. She is gone.’ I forgot where I was and threw the casket.”
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- “Whoever invented liquor should be shot dead immediately, hangovers are the worst. I swear it feels like a very fat baby is kicking me repeatedly in the head.”
- “I was led to believe that guns were loud until I dropped the damn shampoo in the shower.”
- So I am at the office and I tell this guy to pass me the stapler, but when he passes it, he must ensure staples are in it, because if there isn’t any, I cannot staple anything’.
- “You like cheese without the corners, in other words, you’ll never be a slice bitch!”
- If I still cannot hear what you have to say after you have repeated it three times, I will just laugh and hope it was not a question.
Can’t get enough? The best way to get more of Kevin Hart’s Jokes is by watching his movies.